“Laughing My EGO OFF”
When you hear the word "Ego," you probably picture some cocky dude strutting around convinced he’s a gift from the gods and thinks his shit doesn’t stink and smirks at everyone because he is deluded that everyone wants to sleep with him and how lucky you would be to be the presence of such a greatness. Yeah, that fucking guy. (Excuse me, I suddenly have to puke). We’ve all met that deutschbag and they are usually paired up with their trusty sidekick, Narcissism.
But here’s the kicker—ego isn’t always a dirty word. Sometimes, it’s that little boost you need. It’s your personal hype man, the one that tells you belong here. Confidence? Self-assurance? That’s the good side of the ego coin.
But the flip side? Oh, it’s a whole mess. Why has nobody explained this to me is baffling so I started asking around. Like, have you ever asked people what “ego” even is? Most people will hit you with the blankest of stares. “Uh... it’s, like, confidence? I guess?” Even my therapist hem and hauled with no definitive answer. Honestly, I expected more for the price of those sessions!
So, me being the investigative genius I am (my ego talking), I decided to do some digging. What I discovered blew my mind. My whole entire life, my ego has been a mass manipulating me, making me a hot mess, and I didn’t even realize it! It’s constantly analyzing by comparing and judging to see who is better or worse. Is someone more superior to the other? And some egos make people feel better than and others less then. And the Ego’s “so called protection plan for maintaining our self-worth or lack of it feeds on fear!! Fucking fear. WTF!
This little shit lives in constant terror—fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of looking stupid (been there), fear of someone -gasp- not liking you, fear of abandonment, fear of not being perfect, fear of being found out. But just as it turns out this sneaky twisted jerk fears one thing above all—death. Yeah, the ego's biggest fear is dying. It’s like, “OMG, what if people stop thinking about me? What if I’m not the center of attention?” Ego’s worst nightmare right there, y’all.
Let me tell you about a time my ego had me completely unhinged. Picture this: I’m at a social gathering, feeling cute, when someone casually says, “Wow, that is an interesting look!” That was it. My ego heard, “YOU LOOK LIKE A MUTANT TODAY, AND EVERYONE HERE IS HORRIFIED BY YOUR PRESENCE!”
So, naturally, I went home in a full emotional meltdown. My brain latched onto that comment like a leech and drained every ounce of rational thought. I ruminated on it for WEEKS. Not hours. Not days. WEEKS. I was like, “What did they mean by ‘interesting’? Do I look bad? Is my hair too high? Should I cancel all future social engagements?!” I swore, on my very soul, that I would never leave the house again unless I was in black leggings and a hoodie. For weeks, I tortured myself over that one comment. I was a hot, ego-fear-driven mess. I even pep-talked my reflection in the mirror, “You got this. You’re not a mutant. You’re fabulous!”
Eventually, the fog lifted, and I realized I had been sent into this emotional tornado because I am just too sensitive. But when in reality, that little gremlin hijacked my brain and turned a passing comment into a personal insult series on Amazon.
So, how do we avoid these emotional meltdowns, courtesy of our ego? Well, you can’t totally get rid of it (sadly), but you can deflate it like a sad balloon. And let me tell you, what I learned are some of the best ways to give that flyin-fuck a run for its money. Be vulnerable, ask for help and make the ego loathe, gratitude stopping the egos “woe is me”, admitting your wrong and you make mistakes is like kreiptonite to the ego. It detest being wrong. The Ego is orgasmic when it is pulling you into the past and pushing you into future freak-outs so try to stay in the present moment because that is all that really matters. Starve that glutton with positive thinking, negative thinking feeds that beast. And the least favorite because it is so efficient is practicing humility, think about others more and youself less and stay humble and your ego won’t know what hit it.
And my absolute favorite way to take the air out of that cocky jackass, Laughter!.You gotta laugh at yourself. You spill coffee on your shirt? Laugh. You trip in front of people? Laugh harder. When you can laugh at your own ridiculousness and laugh at life’s lil jokes. Suddenly you are not suffering and you’re telling your ego to take a back seat. Nothing shuts down an overinflated ego like a good belly laugh. Bonus points if you laugh out loud in public—it’ll send your ego spiraling into a panic, and that’s how you win.
So, next time your ego spirals you into an existential crisis , take a step back, breathe,and embrace all the messiness and absurdities of life. Because let’s be honest, we’re all just winging it anyway. And remember what the great Mark Twain said: 'The human race has only one effective weapon, and that is laughter.' So laugh, laugh so hard that you have to do the pee pee dance. XOXO
